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Submitted on
February 3
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Sleep, Sugar by RabbitRoses Sleep, Sugar by RabbitRoses
Hear your heart beat
Beat a frantic pace
And it's not even 7 AM
You're feeling the rush
Of anguish settling
You cannot help showing them in

Hurry up then
Or you'll fall behind and
They will take control of you
And you need to heal thr hurt behind your eyes
Fickle words crowding your mind

Sleep, sugar, let your dreams flood in
Like waves of sweet fire, you're safe within
Sleep, sweetie, let your floods come rushing in
And carry you over
To a new morning

Try as you might
You try to give it up
Seems to be holding on fast
It's hand in your hand
A shadow over you
A beggar for soul in your face

Still it don't matter, if you won't listen
If you won't let it follow you
You just need to heal
Make good all your lies
Move on and don't look behind

Sleep, sugar, let your dreams flood in
Like waves of sweet ifre, your'e safe within
Sleep, sweetie, let your floods come rushing in
And carry you over
To a new morning

Day after day
Fickle visions, messing with your head
Fickle, vicious 
Sleeping in your bed
Messing with your head
Fickle visions
Fickle, vicious.
"Sleep", Poets of The Fall…

Alright, it's high time that I cleared some things up on Vanilla.
For the longest time I've been holding back on developing her and giving her a fully recognized backstory, because I wasn't sure if I should let her be more of her own person or keep her very similar to me. Ultimately I decided that, if she's going to fit in with Delune, she needs to have a background. So, after spending a couple months thinking over her story, I finally have a finalized version.

And so, let me give you all a better introduction to Vanilla, and where she came from.

A very long time ago, the barrier that kept the mortal realm of Delune separate from the supernatural forces of the spirit worlds used to be very strong. And magic, supernatural happenings, and other strange things were not something that existed in Delune. That is until, one day, a traveller decided to let her curiosity get the better of her-- despite being warned not to meddle with forces that she didn't understand, she selfishly sought out a way into the spirit realm. And as a result, she fractured that sacred barrier and unleashed all sorts of unknown and mysterious forces into Delune. Both good, and bad.

The higher powers where not pleased with this mortal for destroying the balance of things, and so, a curse was placed on the traveller for her actions. She was cursed to be reborn, over and over, and watch over the madness that she had unleashed for all time.

And so, as centuries passed, the woman was reborn and reborn into many different forms. From a priestess in a medieval Delune, to a gangster in the 1940s. Each time she would die, she would be born again as someone new. In her first few incarnations, she knew who she was and what her destiny was, but as she continued to be born over and over again the memory has begun to fade.

And that brings is to Vanilla.
Vanilla, a seemingly average young woman  from a remarkably small and dysfunctional family, is in fact the latest reincarnation of that traveller. And she has no memories whatsoever of who she was in her past lives.

So, surely must have it easy right? If she can't remember who she used to be in her past lives then she doesn't know about her responsibilities and must be able to live a normal life, right?


The fact that Vanilla knows so little about her family's ancestory or who she is or where she came from makes her feel uneasy. Contrary to what some people might believe, Vanilla isn't an "ignorance is bliss" sort of person. She wants and needs to know things. Knowledge and identity is valuable to her, but her entire existence so far has been nothing but uncertainty. On top of that, although she may not remember her past lives while she's conscious, her old memories have began to slip into her inconscious mind while she's asleep. She has very vivid dreams and nightmares about the women who she used to be in her past lives, though she isn't fully aware that these women in her dreams are actually her, she understandably feels a connection to them.

And it genuinely frightens her that all the women in her dreams seem to die early, and gruesome deaths.

These repeating nightmares have led Vanilla to believe that there is something terrible coming her way. Perhaps she will die a young and violent death too? Perhaps she is doing something wrong, and that is how she will be punished? The only problem is, she doesn't know the full truth. All she has to go off are her dreams, and the looming feeling that something terrible will come for her if she doesn't watch her step.

Because of this, Vanilla tries her hardest to be a good person. She doesn't really believe that it will help, but it's a caution that she has decided to take for her own safety. Sometimes though, she doesn't know how long she will be able to keep up her kindness. She's very isolated as a person, as she doesn't feel like she can talk to people about her nightmares and be taken seriously, she thinks that people will assume she's delusional... To be honest, she thinks that she's delusional, too. To an extent anyway. It may well be only a matter of time before she eventually snaps.

I bet this makes you look at all those pictures I've drawn of her being happy and upbeat in a whooooole different light.

Her backstory also serves a double purpose as an explanation to why Delune is such a weird place. I know that some people have been a little bit "whaaat?" when it comes to the paranormal aspects of my stories so, well, now you know how it all began. If it wasn't for past!Vanilla being an idiot who wanted to play with power, Delune probably wouldn't have ghosts, or demons, or vampires wandering around.

Onto the image itself, a lot of things here symbolize her struggles and her fears, and the symbolism here is pretty easy to spot. She's stood in a darkened hallway, outside the window dawn is just beginning to break, this represents the fact that she has trouble sleeping. The pocket-watch, which is going to become a permanent part of Vanilla's design once I draw her new outfit, symbolizes how time may be running out for her. And the ghostly shadow hands? They're not actually there, they're just imaginary manifestations of her doubt. 

Also, I tried taking a different art direction for this drawing, and I made perhaps my first serious attempt at a lineless artwork. The results might be a little bit sloppy because I'm not used to drawing in this way, but I had so much fun with it, I am not even kidding! Even if the results are mixed. I think it looks kind-of painting ish. I might or might not return to this technique and refine it someday, but for now, I'm pleased with this attempt <3

Characters featured: Vanilla

Characters and artwork (c) CendrillonRose
Not to be used, altered, or reposted without permission.

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Pimienta-fur Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2014
*o* I love it!
Bitchkraft Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2014  Hobbyist
The lineless style is so pretty, Jo < 33 The emotion in her face is beautiful
evanfrnch1 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014
quite a story, I'd give vanilla a hug too, since I'm sure she wishes she didn't have the curse of dying and being reborn all the time and never knowing who she truly is
RabbitRoses Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014
Truth be told, she doesn't really know what she wants, since she doesn't even know about her curse. She just thinks that she's crazy and that something is going to kill her.
In the mean time though, she's totally up for accepting hugs. :'D
evanfrnch1 Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2014
Well here's another one for the long road out of eden (double time hug)

SilverJinxx Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014  Student General Artist


Jo u always breaking my heart girl. Holy crap

that is honestly a wonderful backstory even with it being so sad. I feel so bad for Vanilla and what she is going through ;3;

and this is just gorgeous, the art~ It looks painterly which I love love love and just the symbolism and the look of it~

it's gorgeous ;u;

RabbitRoses Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014
8''''I It's my speciality Shell. I'm known around these parts as JO, DESTROYER OF UR KOKORO. //shot

I'm glad to hear it. To be honest, she's been a really difficult character to write a backstory for. I always knew that she was going to have some significance to Delune, but I didn't want to make her some god-like or ruler-type figure, nor did I want to make her the typical "sad immortal who has lived hundreds of years and is saddened by their cruel life". I think I've struck a good balance between making her paranormal and still very much mortal and at least a little bit relateable. 

I had too much fun with this aa ;u;
SilverJinxx Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014  Student General Artist


gurl u need that title on a plaque, that is a lifetime achievement. //shot


yes B'3 its a good balance of mysterious mixed in with heartbreak, especially considering the circumstances behind it. Its also extremely unique and I love it so <3 the relatableness is the best part cause then you really get a feel for Vanilla



TravisRaccoonus Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
So....... Vanilla is like the avatar? XD

Anyway. This makes me so sad now. As you said I was use to seeing her bee happy and upbeat, but makes me want to cry for her and giver a big ol hug ;n;
RabbitRoses Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2014
X'D Like legend-of-aang avatar or blue-cat-people avatar? Either way, I don't 100% get the reference.

I know, right.
The worse part is, because she has no real memories of her past lives, she thinks that she's just crazy. 
vanilla: 8''C come at me with the hugs, man.
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